I Don't Know Where to Start...

When you've spent a long time away from a person or a place... or a blog, it can be daunting to begin the conversation once more. How do you return to the familiar without explaining your absence? How does this new you mesh with the version of you that they've come to know? Where does one start such a terrifying task?

These are the kinds of questions that have kept me from this space. I don't know how to summarize what has happened since I last put words on this page. I can't tell you in a couple paragraphs how the events of 2013 affect who I am today and who I am becoming in 2014. There are some excuses mixed in with the questions too. It's easy to get overwhelmed by questions and excuses and never actually get back to the thing you know you are meant to do.

In my absence however, the words have not ceased to exist. I find myself noticing metaphors in the act of snow shoveling. I make connections that I long to share and explore... a community I itch to create. I want to believe that I can be a writer, but I want so much more at the same time.

And so I wait. I forget that great thought. I notice someone else has already made that connection. I sit on the words... until today. Maybe today is where I start. I'm striving to understand that it's okay, and sometimes even best, to only think about right now. To not have a plan for what comes next is my worst nightmare... but it's real life. For today, it is enough to say I am here.